Pleased to See YourSELF?
Everyday I meet lots of people, from the moment I wake up, go to school, attend classes until I reach back home. Lots of people, lots of personalities and surely a variety of interests. Some are serious, others are wacky or silly, while others ... well, just about any kind of personality imaginable. I too, along with others, am a unique personality with my own desires and motives.
Just like what Greene said, mirroring the other makes the other see himself and hence develop a certain fondness of his reflection. Since I got his confidence in me after a hard time of pretending that we have the same interests, I get access to his mini library and able to get his help whenever needed. We don't argue often because he sees me as a friend. It is quite a favor actually because he likes to counter argue many of the interests my real friends have.
Greene was right that others will love seeing themselves in other persons. He calles this the “Narcissus Effect.” Personally, I think it stems from a disillusioned appreciation that there is someone who wants to be like you. Especially in my case, he knew already that we won't make great friends due to our personalities but I showed him that I am interested in what he is interested. In doing so, I got the weak side of him and am now able to manipulate him into supporting my goals.
Greene also adds that some of the effect of this “mirroring” is the “Neutralizing Effect” which is basically baffling the other because the other can't see your true motives because the other is blinded by you mimicry. Another is that of the “Moralizing Effect” which is, in short, a way of correcting the other by making the other feel the bad side of his actions. This is a particularly effective way of teaching someone because it allows the other to experience the bad consequences of his actions. Lastly, mirroring the other disguises you from very observant eyes because the similarity of both (you and the other) confuses the observer making it harder to determine who did what. This Greene calls this last effect as the “Hallucinatory Effect.”
I also think that it stems from the concept of utang na loob. My “friend” will try his best not to fight with me for the sake of the friendship that has already developed. The “friend” will make efforts to repay the acts of kindness I showed him. Especially here in the context of Filipino culture, many sees these little acts of kindness as personal favors. Perhaps people are motivated to feel indebted because it's not everyday that they are appreciated for who they really are.
However, I must say that this mimicry is very hard to do because the “copy”, can only be an unfaithful copy of the original. It is, perhaps, not the wisest move but it definitely can produce the desired results. Therefore for me, mimicry is an art to master and it begins by knowing your enemy.
20 comments:
law 44
I agree with Mr. Tariman that the "mirror effect" is some kind of technique to be able to manipulate your enemy. In seeing your interests and goals through other people, it is manageable to entice your enemy into siding with you. Because of you "mimicking" your enemy, he could sense that you are not harmless in any way, and not attack you.
Again, I believe that this law is another law which makes use of deception. You deceive your enemy that you are a friend by mirroring his attitudes. But nevertheless, I believe that this is a good way of making friends with people, and eventually getting information from them. For instance, in our government, many politicians mimic the way GMA runs the country in their own provinces or cities. In this way, they can get GMA's support and in turn work for their advantage. But then again, the question to ask is: Are we really willing to do anything for power?
Joan Medalla
Hi18 N
How can you be friends with someone if you keep on imitating them? I think that this law doesn't employ deception, because it teaches a lesson. Mirroring someone is a way of irritating a person. Remember when we were kids, we would imitate someone if we get irritated with them to give them a taste of their own medicine.
Miguel Rojas
Hi18O
I definitely agree with what the author said that mimicry is an art to master and the first step is knowing your enemy.
If there is another you in this world, wouldn't you want to collaborate with him, befriend him, make him closer than a brother? This is the true strength of this law. People do not doubt those who are duplicates of them thus in the long run putting down their guards thus getting easily manipulated.
Dexter Tanengsy Hi18-N
If you do it carefully and you do it with a long-term goal in mind, eventually, you will be able to succeed in imitating/knowing your enemy. Meanwhile, the I was talking about the short-term application of the law (in my previous comment), which is to infuriate.
What I'm trying to say now is, the law won't work though (or it will have bad consequences) if you try to combine its two purposes: to befriend the enemy and infuriate him, because how can you irritate and befriend at the same time? :D
Miguel Rojas
Hi18 O
In the absence of tension, friendship can hardly be called a friendship (in the long run). After some time, one ought to be suspicious whenever all he ever gets from his/her friend is a smile or an approving nod. A line has to be drawn somewhere, right? At some point in time, disagreement should and will come. And before one gets the final, unprecedented blow from mimicry, one should be prepared enough to deflect it. Don't let your guard down, even in the midst of "allies". Tension shall always have its way. It is then vital that one keeps his/her mind open. Be on the lookout.
Isn't it also easier and quicker to spot hidden setbacks/flaws from another angle? Mimicking one's enemy may offer that enemy an advantage in that it shows that enemy's actions in a different light and point of view. If that enemy notices what's wrong with his/her actions, he/she may then act accordingly to repair the setbacks.
By the way, when should one stop mimicking his/her enemy? Where can we draw the line, and is there any certain action that cannot be mimicked?
I believe that the "moralyzing effect" strongly applies for me. I used to treat people the same way they treat me. If s/he is friendly to me, then I will return his/her friendliness. But, if s/he snobs me, then I will also snob her. It is a matter of balancing out their acts. Like what the golden rule states, "Do not do unto others what you don't want others do unto you."
As to acquiring power through this law, "utang na loob" has already proven its effectiveness in Philippine politics. It is through "utang na loob" that many of our politicians get elected and many of the cabinet members get appointed by the President. But then, we must consider that these politicians and cabinet members could always turn their back to the people who put them in power. Because aside from "mimicking" you, they can also "betray" you.
Miriam R. Reyes
Hi18-O
Spies in the movies use this law, such as XXX and other undercover agents. They don't make themselves suspicious by "siding" with the enemy. They disguise themselves as their enemy's friend. In XXX, Vin Diesel got the trust of his enemy by shooting his fellow agent, but actually the bullet wasn't real. He even lived in the enemy's place and had the same ideals.
Alex Salaveria
HI18-N
This is such a "poser" law haha but if it gets you somewhere then why not right? I guess if you can do what your friend or enemy can do as well as they can themselves, then go ahead and take the upper hand. You could even use their own strengths against them.
- Bianca Michaela Bes, Hi 18-O
Know thy self know thy enemy. The key to this law’s effectiveness is based on how well you can mimic someone. However it still based on the “copy’s” personality whether he can portray a believable character. Mimicking a certain person’s personality that is somewhat opposite of yours will be very hard. A person who likes listening to heavy metal will have a hard time mimicking a person who listens to easy listening love songs.
If you mirror your enemy, and he realizes that you are like him; he will see his own flaws in your actions and he will try to correct them. Isn't this making your enemy stronger?
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Patrick Reyes | Hi180
mimicry isnt that bad at all. In fact scipio africanus did this. but i guess innovations must take plce in order to effectively use this
vince suelto
Like what Joan said, mimicry may be used to gain allies. As the old adage goes, "Imitation is the highest form of flattery." One must be very careful in using this tactic though. The ones you mimic may view your actions either as positive or as negative.
POSITIVE: They may think you admire them and their ways. They may also have an enhanced view of the effectiveness of their work seeing that someone is attempting to do as they do.
NEGATIVE: They may still have an enhanced view of their work but look at you with resentment as you attempt to imitate them. They may also see you as unoriginal, or just plain irritating.
If irritation is your plan though, then I guess you could go for it!
@Patrick: Not at all times. Take for example Scipio. He had done or imitated the tactics of Hannibal.
Hannibal - released the Italian prisoners for ransom
Scipio - released Aluccius' fiancée for ransom
This is just one example of how the Romans copied the Carthaginians. Hannibal was the first to do that as always. But, eventually, the Romans which was led by Scipio did what they had done to them, applying the same strategy.
End of the war: Romans won, Carthaginians lost.
Indeed, through the mirror effect, the Romans have trained themselves and taught themselves the experience they got from the Carthaginians. Certainly, it is ironic to see Carthaginians failed after the Romans imitated their own strategy. It just shows that the mirror effect could empower one to work against the "orignal."
:Joanne Atienza N
Indeed, mimicry is an effective tool to anger the enemy. But this may lead into predictability. If you always copy whatever your enemy is doing, you should prepare to tweak or modify whatever you perceive as your enemy's weakness.
Marie Dacquel HI18-O
This is a good law. In psychology, you become attracted to someone who has similar attitudes. To make friends, it is usually because you have the same interests on at least one subject. It is also useful if you have friends who are good at something so that you can become close to them once you need something like doing a project that is beyond your own talents-artistically talented or the like.
Alan Mamonluk
Hi18-O
Isn’t it that imitation is the highest form of flattery? To a certain point, yes. But beyond that, it starts to be more and more annoying.
So, what makes this a perfect tool for deception then?
I guess, emulating your enemy, would leave them to think that you are nothing more than a “second-rate copycat”. They may not have the slightest idea of what more you can do. That overconfidence would lead them to their defeat (and your sweet victory).
Katherine Conde
Hi18 O
I agree with what Dan said. But for me, more than knowing your enemy, you have to know yourself and what you can do to beat your enemy. What's a better way to perform this law is to think the way you perceive your enemy to think. You always have to see it to a point that you are not overdoing it. In most cases, balance is really the key.
Joan Medalla
Hi18 N
I also would like to pose the same question Joan asked earlier: WHAT are we really willing to do to achieve power? I think this is another one of those laws that seek to deceive others to get the upper hand.
Eric Andres
HI 18 Section N
So great your post. I like your post. It’s useful and impressive!
Cook at 48 Laws of Power foods.
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